Living in the NOW

I've been falling into a little mental rut lately, or actually, two ruts if you will.

I often find myself reminising about the "Glory Days" (basically high school) OR what people would like to call "Wishing My Life Away". Now don't get me wrong, it's great to remember all the good times you've had, and it's even better to have dreams and goals. But for me, this has gone to a level much more deep and troubling than just that, and gosh darn it I will stop! I must stop because it's getting ridiculous, and to be blatantly honest, it's been making me a depressed Amber, and not the bouncy, happy Amber.

Let me explain a little further. In high school, dancing, singing and cheerleading was my life. MY LIFE. That is no more. It's been a struggle dealing with it too. Church choir just doesn't seem to "do it" for me, and now that I'm married, dance and cheer are for one, not financially feasible, and two, my time is better spent on my husband, church callings, work, and homework even if I did have the money. This is rut numero uno.

Rut numero dos: I cannot stop thinking about babies. I swear, I feel like everyone is pregnant. Everyone is having a baby (I had THREE shower invites just for October-THREE) and that's just here in Texas, not counting everyone I know in Arizona and friends from Utah. Baby makin is becoming a serious deal, and apparantly I missed the memo. Not only that, but I have prayed, I have fasted, and I have prayed and fasted almost EVERY month and the answer is stronger and stronger: Not Yet. I don't get the answer "No" (thank heaven!) just "Not Yet". I cannot deny how strong that answer has been. Why not now? I have no idea. Actually, I do. I'm supposed to finish school. So here's rut number two: I dream and dream of the day I will finally be done with school so I can be a mom.

Here's the problem, and this is why this MUST stop: I am totally neglecting all of the many blessings I'm able to enjoy right here, right now in the present, because I'm either locked away in the past or future. So to help myself get out of this mind set, I'm going to make a little list of why I love my life right now:

1. I can write this blog without having a baby cry in the other room or someone running up to me because "so and so" flicked a booger on the other "so and so".

2. I basically get to do whatever I want on my own schedule.

3. I AM MARRIED. One dream accomplished.

4. I have the opportunity to finish my education! I love school, and love learning.

5. I get to travel whenever I want to.

6. I get to run a million errands without buckling children in and out of carseats a million times and I don't have to deal with the two year old meltdown in the check out line (win!)

7. I get my husband all to myself.

8. I have made great friends here in Texas, and I get to hang out with them and their sweet kiddos all the time.

9. I nanny for the BEST family in the ENTIRE universe!!! Those three sweet babies are my everything. All the laughs and cries over little boo boos and all the runny noses really make me feel like I'm making a difference to someone that really matters to me. How I love those sweet kids and their parents. I dread the day I have to say goodbye.

10. I can have a craft sprawled out all over the table or floor and do it all day long without having anyone stop me.

11. I get to do SO MANY fun recreational things with my hubby and his family! They are so so so much fun! I'm glad my husband is so active and brings back those fun active times for me.

12. Less laundry. Nuf said. I. hate. laundry. I told Steven that once he's on full salary in 8 years that the first person I would consider to help around the house is a laundry lady. I hate it THAT much. I'd rather clean a million toilets than do the laundry, yes seriously.

13. Less messes! Although, my cat does a great job at messing up the apartment. I got home today and discovered that he had gotten into the cheeze-it box and there were cheeze-its scattered all over my kitchen floor. I swear...his cute fuzzy face saves his life sometimes...

See? Lots to be greatful for and lots of fun things about my life! I feel better already :) I think I should make this a mental exercise every single day. Today is the first day of conquering my mental "illness". Here's to many many more!

-AN

Fall Fun

Well the last two weeks or so have been pretty fun. The temperatures keep dropping little by little and I am loving it! Today we have a high of 81, but by Thursday the high is only supposed to be 63-yay! That means sweaters, hot chocolate and oatmeal. Three of my favorite things :) Anyway, here's what we've been doing the last two weeks:

Last Saturday we went to the Fort Worth Zoo. The weather was great, and we we're bored, so we decided to go! (I also get some extra credit for a class by going and writing a little paper) Here's some pictures!

Happy Halloween?

Last Tuesday I didn't have to work and Steven's schedule was light enough that we we're able to escape for a day and go to the State Fair! It was so much fun and definitely BIG-Texas style. Steven and I like to look at cars so we really liked the car exhibits that they had. It was pretty fun to run around and look at the new 2012's, but we especially like oooohing and ahhhhing over the luxury cars. The new 2012 Lexus two row SUV hybrid is very, very, very nice. We also liked looking at the Chevy Volt-it's pretty rad. Anyway, we also looked at all the animals, and ate deep fried everything. It was a great day!

Deep Fried Grilled Cheese Sandwich and a Funnel Cake! Heart attack city!

Reminds me of Charlotte's Web!

Deep Fried Pepperoni Pizza. Delicious and Disgusting all at the same time...

-Crew of Two

One monster post!

I am going to try to make this post as easy to read and as efficient as possible. So many things have been happening in our lives within the last 6 weeks! Here we go:

1. Annual Neeley Girls Trip (plus little nephews). About three weeks ago I ditched school for four days to join my husband's family (just the girls and three little nephews) in Disney World. It was awesome! The weather was a bit sticky, which I am not a fan of, but it was a great trip. I feel so lucky to have such wonderful in-laws-I love them all!

Disclaimer: I have to be honest and say that I get a little embarrassed about how much I leave and vacation. I have never vacationed so much in my life since I got married. I try not to put much on facebook about when I come and go because I try to be sensitive to my friends and other people's situations. My worst fear is that someone will think that I'm trying to rub it in their face, or they'll think I'm ungrateful for everything I have. If anything, it has been an overwhelmingly humbling experience since I got married. Even before I got married, I have always been very blessed. I try not to take anything for granted.

It's SMEEEEE!!!

Stef and I waiting to go on Star Tours!

I texted this picture to Steven while I was gone with a caption that said, "It's a boy!", but I don't think he found it as funny as I did...

2. This last weekend my mom came to visit me and we went to the Taylor Swift concert! I heard that she wasn't that good live, and whoever told me that is off their rocker. It was UH. MAZ. ING. WOWWWW!!! I want to cry just thinking back on it, it was that good. The whole time I didn't want it to end. I also felt like a total dork because there wasn't a single song that I didn't know every word to. Ya, I guess I'm a total Swifty! It was also incredible watching her in the Cowboys Stadium. It was by far the biggest crowd she has had all tour and it was awesome to see her reaction to us-you could tell she was totally blown away by the deafening roar!

:)

<3

She is so pretty!

3. During this same weekend my hubby was down in central Texas doing the tough mudder race with his mom, two sisters and our brother-in-law Kyle. They were totally awesome and they all finished the race (which includes 11 miles, 23 obsticals, mud, water and craziness). Steven said it was one of the most fun things he has ever done, and he has convinced me to do one with him in January in Phoenix.

Team Awesome!!! (from left to right: Kina Thompson, Stefanie Delorey, Kyle Thompson, Steven Neeley, Becky Neeley)

Stef and Steven

Steven and my mother-in-law Becky

Stef and Steven

Ya, they're crazy :).

That's basically all of the fun and exciting things that we have been up to lately! Steven just found out that he made an A for his first quarter of his 2nd year and I am so proud of him! He has been studying so hard! I love TCU, and I've made some new friends. I am enjoying my CTR 4 class, and I am excited for the Primary Program in two weeks. Halloween is almost upon us and Steven and I are running a Halloween 5k called the Vampire Run on the 29th. All is well! Loving life!

P.S. Scampi still exists. He's very, very, very active and is a total nut case. He stole my make up brush from my bathroom (and I know because I caught him) and then he stole it again and it is no where to be found...poor brush :(

-Neeley Crew of Two